Never the Twain

Never the Twain (1981)


  • Genre: Comedy
  • Creator: Johnnie Mortimer
  • First Air Date: 1981-09-07
  • Last Air Date: 1991-10-09
  • Total Seasons: 11
  • Total Episodes: 67
  • Status: Ended
  • Episode Runtime: 30 min.
  • Network: ITV1
star 6.4/10
From 7 Ratings

Summary

Never the Twain is a British sitcom that ran for eleven series from 7 September 1981 to 9 October 1991. It was created by Johnnie Mortimer, and was the only sitcom he ever created without his usual writing partner, Brian Cooke. Mortimer wrote the entirety of the first two series and four episodes out of six of the eighth, with the rest being mainly written by Vince Powell and John Kane. It starred Windsor Davies and Donald Sinden as rival antique dealers, and also starred Derek Deadman, Zara Nutley, Robin Kermode, Tacy Kneale, Julia Watson, Honor Blackman, Teddy Turner and Maria Charles. The title is taken from the Rudyard Kipling poem; The Ballad of East and West.

  • Keywords: rivalry, feud, sitcom
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    Never the Twain Trailer

    Never the Twain Seasons

    Season 1

    First Air Date: 1981-09-07
    6 Episodes

    Season 2

    First Air Date: 1982-09-07
    6 Episodes

    Season 3

    First Air Date: 1983-10-10
    6 Episodes

    Season 4

    First Air Date: 1984-11-08
    6 Episodes

    Season 5

    First Air Date: 1986-01-08
    6 Episodes

    Season 6

    First Air Date: 1987-01-15
    6 Episodes

    Season 7

    First Air Date: 1988-01-27
    6 Episodes

    Season 8

    First Air Date: 1988-10-24
    6 Episodes

    Season 9

    First Air Date: 1989-09-06
    7 Episodes

    Season 10

    First Air Date: 1990-09-05
    6 Episodes

    Season 11

    First Air Date: 1991-09-04
    6 Episodes

    Never the Twain Episodes

    Title Air Date Duration
    Season 1Episode 1Families at War30 min
    Season 1Episode 2Of Meissen Men30 min
    Season 1Episode 3A Night at the Opera30 min
    Season 1Episode 4A Matched Pair30 min
    Season 1Episode 5Nothing But the Truth30 min
    Season 1Episode 6Father of the Groom30 min
    Season 2Episode 1Who's Been Sleeping in My Bed?30 min
    Season 2Episode 2As Young as You Feel30 min
    Season 2Episode 3A Woman's Place ...30 min
    Season 2Episode 4Blood Brothers30 min
    Season 2Episode 5lf You Knew Susan30 min
    Season 2Episode 6The More We Are Together30 min
    Season 3Episode 1Taking Stock30 min
    Season 3Episode 2Partners30 min
    Season 3Episode 3A Nose for Quality30 min
    Season 3Episode 4The End of the Line30 min
    Season 3Episode 5The Welsh Connection30 min
    Season 3Episode 6Not on the Same Wavelength30 min
    Season 4Episode 1A Home of Your Own30 min
    Season 4Episode 2The Royal Connection30 min
    Season 4Episode 3Words and Music30 min
    Season 4Episode 4No Flame Like an Old Flame30 min
    Season 4Episode 5Love's Neighbours' Lost30 min
    Season 4Episode 6Come Fly with Me30 min
    Season 5Episode 1In Whom We Tryst30 min
    Season 5Episode 2Going, Going, Gone30 min
    Season 5Episode 3Thicker Than Water30 min
    Season 5Episode 4Kung Who30 min
    Season 5Episode 5Reading Between the Lines30 min
    Season 5Episode 6Definitely Not Cricket30 min
    Season 6Episode 1Feed a Cold30 min
    Season 6Episode 2Going to Pot30 min
    Season 6Episode 3Love ls a Many Splendoured Thing30 min
    Season 6Episode 4A Night to Remember30 min
    Season 6Episode 5The Battle of Deveraux Dale30 min
    Season 6Episode 6Affair of the Heart30 min
    Season 7Episode 1Settled Out of Court30 min
    Season 7Episode 2The Wagers of Sin30 min
    Season 7Episode 3Betrothed, Bothered and Bewildered30 min
    Season 7Episode 4The Second Time Around30 min
    Season 7Episode 5Born to Blush Unseen30 min
    Season 7Episode 6Fasten Your Seat Belts30 min
    Season 8Episode 1Grandfathers-in-Law30 min
    Season 8Episode 2Nursery Times30 min
    Season 8Episode 3Whose Baby?30 min
    Season 8Episode 4Never Say Die30 min
    Season 8Episode 5Moving On30 min
    Season 8Episode 6It's a Long Way to Friern Barnet30 min
    Season 9Episode 1Just the Ticket30 min
    Season 9Episode 2A Point of Honour30 min
    Season 9Episode 3A New Lease of Life30 min
    Season 9Episode 4Aspects of Love30 min
    Season 9Episode 5Neighbours30 min
    Season 9Episode 6Bonjour Paris30 min
    Season 10Episode 1X Marks the Spot30 min
    Season 10Episode 2S.W.A.L.K.30 min
    Season 10Episode 3Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?30 min
    Season 10Episode 4Happy Holiday30 min
    Season 10Episode 5There But for the Grace of God30 min
    Season 10Episode 6A Car by Any Other Name30 min
    Season 11Episode 1Viva Espana30 min
    Season 11Episode 2The Best Laid Plans30 min
    Season 11Episode 3Born Again30 min
    Season 11Episode 4There Goes the Bride30 min
    Season 11Episode 5Two Fools and Their Money30 min
    Season 11Episode 6The First of the Queue30 min
    • Donald Sinden

      as Simon Peel
    • Windsor Davies

      as Oliver Smallbridge
    • Zara Nutley

      as Aunt Eleanor
    • Honor Blackman

      as
    • Teddy Turner

      as Banks
    • Derek Deadman

      as Ringo

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